


A day for Ghosts

by Bobo_is_tha_Bomb



Category: Gundam Wing
Genre: Angst, Drama, F/M, Gen, Reader Insert
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-17
Updated: 2019-09-17
Packaged: 2020-10-20 16:03:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,657
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20678102
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bobo_is_tha_Bomb/pseuds/Bobo_is_tha_Bomb
Summary: Today was a good day. It was time to see some ghosts from your pastFrozen Teardrop one-shot.





	A day for Ghosts

**Author's Note:**

> Today and tomorrow I will only post a few one-shots. On Thursday I will head to Paris for a few days and I don’t think I will be able to update or post anything then. Next week I will resume my updating schedule! :)
> 
> This one-shot was written a couple of years ago, when not much was known about Frozen Teardrop’s plot yet. As I still haven’t taken the time to study the plot, I have no idea if this little story clashes with Frozen Teardrop. I still wanted to share it though, so I hope you will enjoy it! :)
> 
> Disclaimer: I don’t own Gundam Wing, its characters, or you.

**A day for Ghosts**

You sigh and straighten in your seat. The long flight is tiring but you refuse to let it show. You glance over to the young man on the other side of the private shuttle. He sits sprawled in his seat, his expression twisted into a scowl. He is glowering, probably because he has to be in your presence. He doesn’t like it. You turn your gaze away from him and stare out of the shuttles window. It hurts. It’s unbelievable but after almost fifteen years it still hurts. The worst part is that he knows how much it hurts and he doesn’t seem to care.

You close your eyes for a moment and tell yourself to ignore his silence. Your thoughts drift back to the phone conversation from a few weeks ago.

_“We’re going to wake him up.” The voice on the other end of the line had been achingly familiar, but not as you remembered it. It had sounded older, mature._

_“Oh…” was all you had been able to say._

_“Do you want to be there?” he had asked._

_“I’m not sure. I have to think about it, Duo,” you had said._

_Duo had chuckled. “It’s Father Maxwell now.”_

_“You know you will always be Duo to me,” you had said with a smile._

_“Will you bring him?” Duo had asked you._

_“I will ask him, yes. But I’m not sure if he is going to be there. He is quite stubborn, you know.” You had sighed._

_“What can I say,” Duo had said gently. “Like father like son.”_

_You had been silent for a while but when you spoke again your tone was faintly hopeful. “Duo? Will he remember me?”_

_“I don’t know.”_

The next day you had decided not to be present, but you would visit them later. Today was a good day. It was time to see the ghosts from your past.

You look at the young man and smile faintly. He looks so much like his father. He is the splitting image of the young man you had loved twenty years ago. He is like his father in many ways. He is stubborn, silent, and stoic. But you know that he harbors the same kindness, the same uncharacteristic gentleness. He notices that you are looking at him and turns his gaze in your direction. His Prussian blue eyes glare at you. You can read the accusation in them, the anger. But he remains silent.

He tears his eyes away from you as the co-pilot opens the door to the cockpit. “We’re nearing the space station.”

He nods and straightens in his seat. You watch as he checks his gun. So much like his father…

You swallow as you feel a lump form in your throat. No tears, you tell yourself. You will not cry. 

Ten minutes later the shuttle docks in the space port of Mars and the young man gets up. “We have arrived, Ma’am.”

You are unable to say anything. He had called you _Ma’am_. Not _Mom_. Not even _Mother_. You meet his gaze and get up as well. You follow him to the shuttle’s exit. You speak up before he can step outside. 

“Heero,” you say gently. “I do hope that you realize that I never meant to-”

“Force me on this trip?” His tone is sarcastic and you feel hurt squeeze around your heart. 

“Aren’t you curious?” you ask him.

“He never was my father,” he says. His voice is monotone as he says it. “Just because we share some DNA doesn’t make him my father.”

You smile sadly as you catch the underlying meaning in his words. He was talking about the man he did consider to his father. “He probably doesn’t even remember me.”

“Then why did you bother coming here?” He glares at you.

You reach out and take his hand. He pulls away from you and continues on his way out of the shuttle. He mentions you to stay close to him and you do. You barely see him on a daily basis so you are happy that President Cathalonia has arranged for him to be your bodyguard on this trip. She knows how important your son is to you, even though he always pushes you away.

At the space port there is a familiar man waiting. He looks older, but he is clearly one of the former Gundam pilots. You smile when you see him and are quick to embrace him. He stiffens at your actions and you pull away with a laugh. “Come on, Wufei.”

He gives you a faint smile. “You haven’t changed much I see.”

You shake your head. “I might be the vice foreign minister, but I’m still me.”

Heero rolls his eyes and you give him a scolding stare. No matter the fact that he didn’t like you, you were still his mother and you didn’t want him to defy you in public.

“Let’s go,” Wufei says.

You follow him to the exit of the spaceport where his car is parked. The drive to the secret base is silent. You don’t know what to say. Anticipation makes your stomach flutter.

“How is he?” you suddenly ask.

“Considering the circumstances, pretty well,” Wufei says. 

Heero stiffens in his seat next to Wufei. 

“Does he remember?” you ask.

“He remembers fragments of his past, but not everything,” Wufei explains. “Sometimes I think it’s for the better.”

“Hmm…” You lean back in your seat and watch your son’s profile. 

He sits rigidly in his seat and tenses up even more as he feels that you are watching him. You sigh quietly and close your eyes for a moment. It was no use trying to convince him that you love him. It was no use trying to show him affection. He would always push you away. He blames you for everything. 

You arrive at the base and follow Wufei; you remind yourself that you have to call him Master Chang now, into a comfortable living room. You look around with a faint smile. There is a boy sitting in front of the television, his long hair running down his back in a tight braid. The scene is so familiar and yet so out of place. It almost looks like you have stepped right into the past. A door on the right opens and a man steps in.

You freeze in surprise, shock. You should have known that he would be here as well. 

“Trowa…” 

In front of you Heero stiffens. You step up next to him so you can watch his face. You see the barely restrained anger in his eyes and reach out to rest a hand on his shoulder. You feel hope flutter in your stomach when he doesn’t shake it off.

“Heero,” you say gently, hoping to ease the pain you know he must be feeling.

“All these years…” he says. His tone carries so much anger and pain that you have to swallow. “All these years I have wondered why.”

You feel his shoulders relax and sigh in relief. For a moment you had been afraid that he would attack the man standing on the other side of the room. He is gazing calmly at the two of you, but in his eyes you can see something… you almost dare to hope. 

Heero chuckles humorlessly and turns towards you. “You knew he was here, didn’t you?”

“No.” You shake your head. 

“Never mind anyway.” He shrugs off your hand and turns around.

“Heero!” you call after him. 

But he is determined to leave the room as soon as possible and storms away. You sigh and turn back towards the man who is now approaching you. 

“Do you want me to talk to him?” he asks.

You shake your head, feeling weary. “No… I don’t think he is going to listen.” 

He halts in front of you and just stands there. You don’t know what to do either. It has been so long… but he had hurt both you and your son. He had suddenly left while you had… You squeeze your eyes shut for a moment and force yourself to push away those memories. Remembering wouldn’t do you any good now.

“So…” you say quietly, “How are you?” 

“Pretty good,” he says with a faint smile.

He reaches out and rests a hand on your shoulder. You gaze up in his green eyes. There are faint lines around the corners of his eyes now. You sigh and step closer to him. You wrap your arms around his waist and rest you head against his shoulder. He wraps his arms around you as well and pulls you closer. 

“I’m sorry,” he mutters in your hair.

You tighten your arms around him for a brief moment before pulling back. “We will talk later.” 

He nods. 

The door on the right opens again. You look at the door and smile with delight. You are quick to embrace the man standing in the door opening. “It’s good to see you again, Duo.” 

He chuckles and leads you over to the sitting area. “Where is the boy?” 

“He ran off,” you say with a sigh.

“It’s best to let him be,” Master Chang says while making his way over to the television. 

He turns it off, earning a heated glare from the boy on the couch. “Hey! I was watching that!” 

You smile. The boy’s stunning likeness to Duo is unmistakable. 

“Go and watch it in your room then,” Master Chang said.

The boys glare and you watch with growing amusement as he opens his mouth to protest.

“Duo,” his father says with a smile.

The boy directs his glare at his father. Then he sighs and stands up. “Alright, alright.” 

He leaves the room and slams the door behind him as he goes.

“He will be here soon,” Trowa says, while sitting down next to you.

“Hmm…” You accept the cup of coffee that Duo offers you with a smile. “Thanks.”

The silence the falls over the four of you is comfortable. You hadn’t seen any of them for so long, but it is still the same. You relax your shoulders and lean back in your seat. “I’m not going to ask about what you all are doing.” 

Duo chuckles. “We wouldn’t tell you anyway.” 

“I think I don’t even want to know.” You smile at him.

You hear the door behind you open and you turn your head to watch who is entering the room. You freeze in surprise when you see your son enter the room, followed by… Your eyes widen. They look so much alike that they could have been twins.

Heero doesn’t look a day older than the day he had left. Your heart squeezes in your chest, and you feel tears come up. You swallow and look at your son. He is gazing at you calmly, but there is no anger in his gaze. You feel Trowa rest a hand on your shoulder. You look at him for a moment and give him a small smile to indicate that you are fine. 

You stand up and approach the two young men. “Hello Heero,” you say.

There is nothing in his eyes that tells you he recognizes you. The hope that had been welling up inside of you crumbles. He looks at you and his eyes are drawn to the blue teardrop on a delicate silver chain that you always wear. Something in his eyes flashes, recognition. The hope returns.

“Do you remember me?” you ask him.

Then he nods. “I do.” 

You hear the others behind you get up. They leave the room and you watch as Trowa mentions your son over. You see the reluctance in his eyes as he walks over to him. Your son gives you a last silent stare before he leaves the room. The door falls shut behind him and you turn your attention back to the young man standing in front of you.

“You were pregnant,” he says calmly.

“I didn’t know I was,” you say, while mentioning him to sit down next to you. “I found out after you left.”

Heero sits down next to you and runs a hand through his hair. The gesture is familiar, old and trusted. “I see.”

You are silent for a while, contemplating what to say. 

“Seeing him is like looking in the mirror,” Heero says suddenly.

You smile and nod. “Yes. There is nothing of me in him.”

A faint smile touches his lips. “Surely there must be something…”

“No.” You shake your head with a sad smile. “And if there is anything, he hides it very well.”

“You have no bond with him, do you?” he asks.

You bite your lip and shake your head once more. “No. It irreparably broke when Trowa left us.”

Heero frowns. “What do you mean?”

“Trowa took care of me after I found out I was pregnant,” you explain. “Do you remember that my parents did not approve of you?” 

He gives you a blank look. “No.”

“They kicked me out when I told them I was carrying your child,” you say. “Trowa showed up one day, to check on me, and he stayed with me until Heero was four. And then he just left.”

“Why?”

You shrug. “I don’t know.”

But you had always had an idea for Trowa’s reasons. It had been your own fault. 

“If I had known…”

“I’d rather not think about what could have been,” you say softly. “It always makes me wish for it and I can’t bear it.”

He reaches out and rests a hand on top of yours. “Then I won’t say it.”

“Thank you.” You give him a small smile.

“He blames you for Trowa’s departure,” Heero says calmly.

“Yes… And he can hold a grudge for a very long time.” You sigh and press your fingers against your forehead. 

“I’m sorry,” Heero says quietly.

“It’s not your fault.” You give him a small smile.

His lips tilt in response. “Hn.”

You sit in silence for a while and enjoy being close to him. It’s comfortable and for a moment you allow yourself to visit the lingering feelings you still have for him. Heero was your first love. You would always have a place in your heart for him. But the rest of your heart belongs to two other men. Your son and… 

“I can’t believe I still call him Trowa. It’s Triton now, isn’t it?” you ask Heero.

He smirks. “Old habits die hard. But yes, it’s Triton now.”

“I guess it doesn’t really matter anyway.” After today you probably wouldn’t see any of them ever again. You have your life back in Brussels and they still have to complete this mission. 

“When all this is over…” Heero say suddenly. “Would you mind if I visit you?”

“If you want to,” you say with a small smile.

He nods. “I do.”

“Then you are welcome.” 

You look up when the door opens and Trowa steps into the room. Triton, you remind yourself firmly. Heero gets up and leaves the room. Triton sits down next to you on the couch. You don’t know what to do or say. There are so many things you still need to know, but you don’t know where to start.

“I…” he starts. 

You meet his eyes and swallow. “Yes?”

He places his hand on top of yours, just like Heero had done. But now it is different. Your heart flutters and everything you still felt for him comes to the surface. 

“I never meant to hurt you,” he says finally.

“But you did,” you say. It doesn’t sound accusing. It’s the truth.

“I know. And I have hurt Heero as well.” He presses his lips together in a thin line. 

You sigh. “Have you talked to him?”

He nods. “And I have told him it wasn’t your fault.”

“What made you leave?” you asked. You had been dying for his answer for fifteen years. It was time you learned why he had left you.

“I…” He seems hesitant. “I felt guilty.”

You frown, not understanding what he meant.

“You are the mother of my friend’s son. I couldn’t take Heero’s place.” 

“He doesn’t consider Heero his father,” you say quietly. “To him it has always been you.”

“I know that now.”

“And you have never taken Heero’s place.” You curl your fingers around his and raise your entwined hands to rest against your heart. “Because you have your own place right here.”

His eyes widen slightly. “But…”

You smile and shake your head. “Let’s not regret the past. We can’t change anything about it.”

He smiles slightly and leans in to press a kiss against your forehead. “Alright.”

You sigh and lean forward, resting your head against his shoulder. His arms encircle your waist and he holds you close. His embrace is comforting and familiar. It heals the wounds in your heart.

“There is one thing I do regret though,” you say quietly. “We can’t stay like this forever.”

“No…” he agrees with you. 

You pull back and give him a small smile. He doesn’t kiss you, but you don’t expect him to. There is so much that he still needs to do and you shouldn’t distract him with your feelings for him. 

The door opens once more and your son steps in. He watches you and Triton for a moment and you get up.

“Are you ready to go?” he asks. His tone is still monotone and you swallow. Why couldn’t he let go of that cold facade? 

You nod. “Yes.”

“Alright.” He leaves the room again and returns later with the others.

Heero is with him and you make your way over to them. Their uncanny likeliness makes you smile. Your son steps aside and you rest a hand on Heero’s shoulder.

“Good luck with your mission,” you say quietly. “Whatever it may be.”

He nods and then unexpectedly pulls you towards him in a hug. You soak in the feeling of peace that settles around your heart and you cling to him for a moment. His embrace may be familiar but he isn’t the same person anymore and neither are you. And he smells different. You draw away and kiss his cheek. 

You turn towards your son and give him a small smile before going to say goodbye to Triton and the others. Master Chang would drive you back to the space port. 

“When this is all over,” Triton says when you hug him, “I will come to you.”

“Don’t promise me anything,” you whisper. “But yes, you may come to me.”

He nuzzles your hair before letting you go. 

You follow Master Chang out of the room without looking back. 

The shuttle flight back to the first space station is spent in silence. You are absorbed in your thoughts and Heero in his. You can’t really blame him. He has a lot to think about. And you hope that this day would make a change for the better. 

Your shuttle docks, and once you get off you see your secretary waiting for you. She had remained behind at the space station, for her own safety. 

“Ma’am,” she speaks up, “Is there anything I can do for you?”

“No,” you start to say. But then you change your mind. “Actually yes. Call president Cathalonia for me and let her know that I will be resigning from my position.”

Your secretary blinks. “Oh… but why?”

“That is something I will tell her personally. Can you tell her that?” you ask her.

She nods. “Certainly, Ma’am.”

She leaves and you sigh. You had no choice but to resign from your position as the Vice Foreign Minister. After what you had seen today you could no longer fulfill your position in the way you should. It was for the better.

Heero steps up beside you. “Are you sure about this?”

You look at him and smile. “Yes.”

You start on your walk to the quarters that had been assigned to you, but are stopped by a hand that closes around your arm. You turn around and feel hope flutter in your stomach at your son’s timid expression. “Heero?”

“I’m sorry,” he says quietly, his voice laced with guilt and sorrow. “I’m really sorry, _Mom_.”

You sob and pull him closer, hugging him for the first time in years. His arms wrap around you and he rests his head against your shoulder. You press a kiss against his temple as tears run down your cheeks. “I can’t say it’s alright. But I do forgive you.”

He tightens his hold on you and sighs. You something wet seeping through the fabric of your sweater and realize that he is crying as well.

“Oh Heero…” you sigh, while running a hand through his hair.

“I knew that I was hurting you…” he says. “But after a while it got so hard to apologize.”

You press a kiss against his temple but don’t speak. You know he isn’t done talking.

“You have always been good to me,” he continues. “I have denied myself so much for so long.”

“You’re stubborn,” you say with a watery smile. “But I guess you get that from Heero.”

You don’t say ‘father’. You know he will never accept the idea of Heero as his father. To him it would always remain Triton. And you would never change that. 

“Come and sit with me for a while,” you say before pulling back.

He nods and smiles. “Yes.”

You know that the future will be uncertain when it comes to you and Triton. He still has things to do, a mission to complete. But you know that between your son and you everything would be alright. It would take a while, but it would be alright.

Yes, today had been a really good day for ghosts.

**\- End -**


End file.
